Spiritual Abuse

Spiritual Abuse

Several years ago, my husband and I were meeting with a seminary student in hopes of starting a church plant in our area. The relationship was cordial and edifying at first, but soon attention turned to me and I became the target of his manipulation. When I began having difficulties with his theology, he would become aggressive and more dogmatic. When the tone switched from polite conversation to lecture, I would direct the student to my husband for further clarification. This was not well received. He would demand conversations with me. If I participated, he would charge me with a "Jezabel Spirit" for attempting to teach a man. If I would decline conversation, I would be charged with cowardice, and all cowards would inherit the lake of fire.

This is one form of spiritual abuse: Damned if you do. Damned if you don't. I think it's

important to recognize that spiritual abuse is a clear and present danger among those who desire to lead Christ's sheep. There are those who lord it over the flock, which is directly condemned in Scripture. And there are those who fail by tearing the sheep apart through the use of anti-gospel messages. These are wolves and not shepherds. Undershepherds nurture and protect Christ's sheep. They don't devour them.

I appreciate Jack Wellman's definition of spiritual abuse in his article: "5 Warning Signs of Spiritual Abuse"

"Spiritual abuse could be defined as someone in a position of authority or leadership in the church taking advantage of such a position by misusing such a position that God has placed them in to try and manipulate, undermine, control, abuse, or coerce them into something unbiblical and ungodly."

My experience with spiritual abuse ended well. It was during that time of trial that the Lord drew me even closer to Himself, and taught me in a deeper way, not to put my trust in man, but in the Lord. Good and faithful undershepherds are truly a blessing, but the Lord is my Shepherd, my Faithful Friend, my Great High Priest, and Tireless Advocate. In Him, there is no condemnation.  

Source: 5 Warning Signs of Spiritual Abuse: https://www.theaquilareport.com/5-warning-signs-of-spiritual-abuse/

See also:
"Pastors Are Not Cowboys" at http://www.agradio.org/pastors-are-not-cowboys.html .

"Spiritual Abuse and Toxic Systems" at  http://www.dianelangberg.com/2018/03/spiritual-abuse-and-toxic-systems/